his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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