We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
