if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Swine flu. Run for my life!
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
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