Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize