butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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