so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
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