I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
