no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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