No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Randomize
