I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
