I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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