There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
