sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
