I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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