Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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