Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
