I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
