you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
