yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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