clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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