I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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