You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
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