Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
