It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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