Christians are straight up FREAKS
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
