Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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