when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Randomize
