Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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