so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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