the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
