i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
