Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
YAS. BRING CRAB.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize