Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
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