And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I supernannyed him into submission
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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