Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
