shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
