She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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