She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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