Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
