Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize