Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
