i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
