Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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