school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize