4 words: hood of his car
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Randomize
