yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
