honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
