i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize