Whod you bang
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
