Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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