Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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